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My earliest sexual experiences involved mutual masturbation — at sleepovers, in someone's unchaperoned basement, or over Skype — but I have often been afraid to admit how formative I believe those early, secret explorations were to my sexual development. On the other side of the final door, a large older man wearing a jockstrap and sneakers ripped our tickets and asked whether it was our first time. What if we see someone we know? Oops Looks like your browser doesn't support JavaScript. Some men I spoke to recounted experimentations with straight friends that ranged from watching porn together to jerking each other off, and for the ones who now identify as gay, these episodes reverberate intensely.

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Elliana. Age: 29.
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Some men I spoke to recounted experimentations with straight friends that ranged from watching porn together to jerking each other off, and for the ones who now identify as gay, these episodes reverberate intensely.

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Hadley. Age: 21.
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Why Some Guys Like Jerking Off Together

One such online space is Kik, where there is at least one large private chat group of men in New York City who are into mutual masturbation. This insistence on the primal, the ur-male act of self-pleasure, is interesting to consider as a dividing line between mutual masturbation and sex, and the distinct kinds of relationships that surround both. New York Jacks is aimed at these men, most of them gay, who are interested in group masturbation — witnessing it, participating in it, and making like-minded friends. The New York Jacks meetup was not my first experience with public group sex.

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